Bullying Doesn’t Discriminate!
Bullying is something that can happen at any age, to anyone, it does not discriminate against, age, ethnicity, gender, race, religion – nothing! And overcoming it, or recovering from it can be one of the hardest things to do.
Bullying can make you feel alone, scared and worthless. In fact, more than a third of people go on to develop social anxiety and depression as a direct result of bullying.
Whilst bullying does not discriminate it can be influenced by gender. Research shows that females use more relational aggression, while males engage in physical bullying.
We have experienced both.
If you’re being bullied, one of the most important things you need to know is that you are not the only one.
The result is the same when you are being bullied, things like self-esteem and confidence take the biggest knock.
We know people internalise the mean comments and try to rationalise why we might’ve been excluded, singled out and picked on.
Eventually, you come to the conclusion that… “It must be me!”
Please believe us when we say “IT’S NOT YOU!”
When we do blame ourselves, it’s like we are convincing ourselves that there’s something wrong with us and before you know it, you’ve got yourself a whole bunch of social anxiety, confidence issues and low self-esteem to contend with.
The worst thing about this is that it follows us around for ages as we get older and it’s difficult to shake. Even after the bullying has ended or been resolved, we’re left feeling low and vulnerable.
What can you do about it?
There are so many actions you can take, talking about it helps so much but the one answer is simple, but not always so easy to achieve: we can learn to love ourselves, and be kind to ourselves.
If that is too “woo woo” for you then take some practical steps and first and foremost talk to someone and ask for help.
Kindness is more important today than it has ever before, and we dedicated our blog last week to talking about Why World Kindness Day Matters More Than Ever Before.
But talking about it, and good intentions is not enough, we must all put a full stop to bullying, and take real action as it can ruin lives!
The isolation of the last eighteen months has underlined how little acts of consideration can break down barriers and brighten the lives of the people around us. This is one of the reasons, that One Kind Word has been chosen as the theme of Anti-Bullying Week
We love the theme this year – One Kind Word – so simple, so brilliant and something everyone can get behind!
One kind word or one act of kindness leads to another. So, whoever you are, wherever you are, online or offline, remember one act of kindness can create a ripple effect that spreads outwards, touching the lives of others and inspiring kindness everywhere.
It starts with One Kind Word and it starts today.
The words we love are:Brave, Compassionate, Thoughtful, Loving, Helpful, Friendly, Caring, Kind.
Often as the bullying continues, either on or offline is your confidence that is affected and it can be life changing and soul crushing.
We found these fantastic tips to rebuild your confidence after bullying from Ditch the Label – the simplicity of them is what is so brilliant and easy to do.
Fifty brilliant tips to rebuild your confidence after bullying.
Try some of these out:
- Tell yourself that you are enough
- Change up your hairstyle
- Watch your favourite movie
- Talk to that mate that always makes you giggle
- Run faster than you’ve ever run before
- Make something you’ve never made before
- Shout out a window really loud about how amazing you are (we dare you)
- Help a mate
- Spend time with a puppy
- Write a list of all your best qualities
- Write a list of all the good things in your life – add to it every day
- Do something that you know you’re really good at
- Accept a compliment by saying ‘thank you’
- Unfollow/block all the things on social media which make you feel worthless
- Ask for help more
- Build something
- Complete a video game
- Find a sense of community – there are so many safe places to seek support.
- Say yes more to fun/new things
- Learn a martial art
- Take up a new sport
- Literally say nice things to yourself in the mirror (a bit cringe at first, but trust me, it really does works)
- Be kinder to the people closest to you
- Read about people who have similar experiences to you
- Talk to people who have similar experiences to you
- Treat yourself once in a while
- Allow yourself to laugh more
- Be outside more
- Hang out with people who make you feel good
- Join a forum
- Understand that the reality is, no one has it easy
- Be creative
- Practise mindful colouring
- Understand that it takes time
- Accept who you are and own it
- Learn about ways to stand up for yourself
- Learn to say no
- Hang out with a puppy
- Discover a new band
- Start your own band
- Be more honest
- Meditate
- Be critical of everything you read online
- Go shopping
- Cook a meal for your family/friends
- Join a club
- Organise activities for friends/family
- Celebrate your achievements no matter how big or small
- List the things you love about yourself
- List the things you are most grateful for
This is a subject very close to our hearts at Fraser Allen Estate Management, as our Managing Director Jodie was bullied so badly when she was younger she was hospitalised from a vicious attack. She wrote about it last year. We must all act to stop bullying – from someone who was bullied mercilessly!
Finally, always remember, even on your darkest day remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you feel and smarter than you think and you are not alone!